I slept beside a creek somewhere in Tennessee last night. I wish I had met someone worthy of a life-changing blog entry (you know, like the other entries here), but I had the place all to myself. As expected, being alone with my thoughts made sleeping almost impossible. Fortunately, the frogs broke up the monotony.
Thinking about a lifetime worth of mistakes and considering the time it would take to properly make amends, I came to the conclusion that, one’s past can be very difficult to live down. That said, we must go on.
“A man needs time to reflect.” That was something I saved for any time the boss caught me stagnant. Having, it seems, all the time in the world now to reflect, the irony of seeking solace in employment, for the sake of distraction, is a bit amusing.
This morning, as the chirping gradually changes from amphibian to avian, the new day brings hope, along with a new regard for company, camaraderie, and even annoyance. Today, regardless of circumstance, my essential goal is to make, at worst, inconsequential memories. They may not be the stuff dreams are made of, but perhaps knits the curtains of quietude.
Nearby is the Westminster Presbyterian Cemetery, where people I never knew are revered for their faded headstones after having been reduced to mere depressions in the earth. Someday, this will be all that’s left, exposing how vitally important and also utterly useless our actions are. It helps to know that these things which burden my mind are so minuscule compared to time’s relentless power of decay–even erasing the names carved into stone. Better, I think, to set my mind on more meaningful thoughts.
I wonder where I’ll rest tonight.
